Success on Fast Forward

In my early days in secondary school, I began to notice something among my peers. While some were immensely successful in their school work and everything looked great for them, some others were always looking shabby, tired and hungry...they were at the bottom of the class. I also noticed that the two groups had their cliques and they moved together on everything. After secondary school, my observation continued and I saw that while some of us immediately continued their education in the university, some took some time (as late as 3 years after leaving secondary school, like me) and while some others didn’t bother to continue. Now am envisaging that some of these peeps will finish the university well, get a good job or start a lucrative business and start a great family! Now that’s what I call success on fast forward. You see, some people are lucky to be born in fortunate families, born with the silver spoon and they also do well in life just as their parents have. Some of these individuals from the Rich homes also end up at very terrible positions in life. There are also accounts of people from poor, wretched backgrounds making groundbreaking and jaw dropping success with their lives. My point here is that it doesn’t matter where you are coming from, doesn’t matter what your past has to say about you, or what your background is like, you can always become what you dream of becoming if you really want to. Life may have not been so good to you so far, but you can change that when you change your inner you...who you are from deep within. It is said that you can take a pig from the mud and bath it and make it look clean but very soon it will be back to the mud. No change can occur on the outside without first occurring on the inside.  This is not a motivating tool but a palette of facts meant to engineer you to be you which is a person of immense success and fulfilment in life. Many have found this joy of living life to the fullest and so can you too. All you have to do is to decide right now to end the sad, empty life you are living (not by committing suicide) and starting a new one of meaning. From this one step, the path to success, being on fast forward, has begun.

Acheiving Immortality

Immortality.  The dream of mankind for ages. It has always been mankind’s greatest ambition to live forever and to elude the Grim Reaper. Attempts have been made but these all ends up in failure. Technologies have been created, chemicals concocted, and rituals made but humans end up still dying. The pain associated with death is so negatively painted in the minds of people that losing a loved one or dying is not to be imagined to occur. But death is inevitable. There is no other way around it.

But even has death takes you away; there is still a way of existing in the minds and hearts of beloved ones. Even though we have been long gone, it can still be as if we were still there, in their very presence. That way my friend, that formula or technology, whatever you want to call it, is nothing other than leaving a legacy behind. All through history in several countries of the world there are legacies that have been left behind by different men and women. Whether these legacies were profitable or not, what matters is that they eventually achieved the goal of being immortal, not in their physical forms but in the unseen forms of respect, adoration or hatred of the person in question. Albert Einstein, Mahatma Ghandi, Theodore Roosevelt, Adolf Hitler, Michael Jackson, Pablo Picasso, Jesus Christ, The Wright Brothers, Stephen Covey...the list is endless. What set this people apart from the average man is the ability or effort to do the extra ordinary, to live unlike other men and create thought systems contrary to what society regards has been standard or conventional. Each one of them were known for something in particular, they were unique as every other individual is but what set them apart is that they discovered that uniqueness and keyed into it. They were people of purpose. And that purpose determined every other thing in their lives.

One day everyone around right now will give their last breath and leave this world for another. But before you go, what do you intend leaving behind for the people still around, for the next generation? It would be selfish to come to this world and not change a thing in it, for at least some had to sacrifice their very lives for things to be different. A life of legacy is a life of purpose.

After all has been said and done...

Yes! That lifelong “success” dream has finally been realised…the houses built, the cars acquired, the businesses are running fine, the family’s happy and every other thing seems to be going on well…and yet there is still this dissatisfaction, this hunger that is crying out to be met. After all that has been said and done, what is the way forward?

The answer lies in the words impact, contribution, influence and blessing. There is more to life than amassing wealth and achieving a faulted conception of success. Success in its purest form is not only about setting goals and achieving them but also seeing to the welfare of others and helping to put a J on their faces. In every community, society or nation, there are maladies and problems that need to be dealt with and removed, to make the next person’s life better. In a psychology class recently, the lecturer asked us what we were doing here on earth, that is, our reason for existence. I sat and listened to my fellows’ responses. One said to live and die (lol), another said to be fruitful (lol) and finally someone said to be problem solvers (correct!). We are here to make the world better than we met it. Everywhere I look, I see problems and these problems demand solutions which everyone in one way or the other should be concerned about solving, because each person has a passion to deal with them. Thomas Edison didn’t like what he saw as regards electricity and he did something about it. There is something out there that is meant to be solved by none other than you. AIDS, hunger, lack of drinkable water, unpaid school fees, torn uniforms, addictions, malaria, exam malpractice, poor power supply, corruption in governance, roaming mad people…these and many more are the challenges before us. It is time to impact, to contribute, to positively influence and to be a blessing, after all has been said and done.

Lessons from a fish!

For years now I have been working as an employee at a farm not too distant from my house. Even though I got admitted to the university, that didn’t stop me from still working at that same farm whenever I went on break. My work there involves feeding the fish, removing the shooters (ones with growth spurts), change their water...generally to make the fish happy, the boss glad and the customer content. There was this particular day when something clicked in my head while I feed the fish. The whole concept about time and timing suddenly made sense. Being a person who usually doesn’t fancy waiting to get something done, I began to see the whole picture. You see, I noticed that when the fish are at a particular stage of growth, it doesn’t look like things will get any better with it. From Monday to Friday, all week long, it seems all the fish are doing is eating and swimming. Nothing seems to be changing with them. They looked the same way they did the day before. This can drive the impatient and inexperienced farmer really wild. But if a wise and patient farmer keeps at doing the right thing of feeding the fish, changing their water, and providing the right conditions in the correct adequacy, with time, he will be amazed at the change that the fish will produce.

The concept also works in our daily lives. Sometimes things look slow, bleak and tiring. At such times its normal to want to give up and throw in the towel. The same stage you were in the business years ago still seems like the same place it is. The same position your marriage was few years after marriage is where it still is; arguments about no baby, not enough money, a bigger house etc still plagues your home. As a student, it seems the whole school thing isn’t just for you. Every of your former classmates have gotten their admission and you are still there writing SSCE and UTME. At every level of life, each person has his/ her own share of troubles. But just like a car sticker says, every problem has an expiry date. So friend cheer up and wait for your own time! With each stage of life comes a lesson that we have to learn before we can move on to the next. Life is in stages and men are in phases. It takes time but like most things, before becoming a wonder they start up as blunders. Know what stage you are in; learn the lessons well, when tests come, pass in flying colours! Only then can you be licensed to move on to the next stage.

Nigerians, The Church People!

Every Sunday I see my people throng to their different churches,
with their attires, headgears and hats giving colours a peacock would be envious of.
They fill the pews as usual,
singing, dancing, clapping, listening and nodding,
their minds gone numb in this weekly ritual.
Afterwards they throng back to their homes.
They return to their normal lives,
some trying to be holy, some trying to survive;
never changing anything where they are.
Things even go worse as they watch.
The corruption is still in the system of governance,
examination malpractice in the exam halls,
the wrong values still in vogue.
They are ignorant!
Unaware of who they really are and what they should be doing:
Changing lives, communities and nations
Impact minded for the kingdom of God
Being prototypes of what Christian living should be.
The Church has to go back
and retrace its steps,
because without doing so,
They make abuse Christ's sacrifice.

Trashing the Moral Junk

It is said that you are what you eat. I couldn't agree less. Different grades of food provide different metabolical results and nutritional adjustments in our bodies. So also is what we feed our minds through the major sense organs- the eyes and ears. Everywhere we look to, information is acquired; in every direction we turn our heads, stories find their way into our ears. The information we receive then shapes us and we become who we eventually are today, as at now, as you read. The internet, books, friends, the media…all these and more are where we get all this information. And many of us have forgotten that not everything we see and hear is beneficial and can add value to us, we just take it hook, line and sinker. We forgot the filter at home, in church or at work. Our brains have gone numb; we can't feel the pain that comes with knowing the wrong thing until it is too late. Information, both good and bad, has become accessible to all, now at the fingertips, even of a twelve year old. Pornography fills the internet and is available with the right combination of words. What is to be done to survive the moral meltdown of the world?
What I see that can be done (you can suggest more as comments) is to replace the unwanted with the wanted, to substitute the flatulence with the scent of an air freshener. As human beings, we have the ability to choose. We are not pavlovian dogs. We have a will and can exercise it. No one can put a thing into our faces and force us to accept it, we are in control. We can always have a choice to avoid the decay and fill ourselves up with the right messages that will program us to think in patterns that bring positive results which eventually lead to pleasure (which is what most people seek when they go after the wrong things). Go to that seminar, pick up that inspirational book or novel or play that impactful message. I have discovered that the information we receive daily determines the quality of life that we live. To change our world, our nation and our individual lives, we need to control what we take in so as to create what we would like to see. It's time for us to be in control!
Please post your comments. Your feedback is valuable.

5 Reasons not to be a church goer

Christians in Nigeria are perpetual church goers! They can go to church every day of the week all in the name of praying and getting close to God. Early Monday morning when they should be headed to work you see them singing and clapping at the church.whenever i personally see this, i feel sick inside. You know why? Because
Christians are kingdom citizens,not some religious sect members and kingdom citizens dont huddle up in a church.
As christians,we are supposed to change and impact society,not passively live in it.
God sent his only Son to serve us,we are to serve the society by teaching kingdom principles,not watch while the devil controls the world and
Christ did not go through all the trouble of dying on a cross so that you and i can have a splendid praise and worship session, die and go to heaven. No! He died so He could restore the kingdom of God back on earth as it was during the time of Adam.
Pastors are meant to equip believers to go into the world and fulfill the great commission by changing society for the better. This is done by helping them find their sphere of influence, that is, where they are most relevant in the society. The church is meant to be a place of building and equipping for impact, not just tithe paying and dancing!

Monday Morning Attitudes

Monday morning, he wakes up grunting and unhappy. The car refuses to start. The traffic jam is sickening. The boss shouts at him as usual for late coming. The papers are all piled up again, as if the ones he finished last week aren't enough. Its closing time and he trudges back home, sighing. Its payday and the moment he has always been waiting for arrives. Friday dawns and he is happier than ever.
Early Monday morning! He's glad and jumps out of bed. Waits for breakfast to be done and takes the kids to school. Kisses them goodbye and drives heartily to work, glad as usual, greets his customers with an infectious and genuine smile. Smiles to the bank on Friday afternoon knowing this weekend will be splendid.
Which of the two guys would you like to affiliate with? Whose lifestyle would you like to emulate? One choose to work for the sake of the next pay check just 30 days away while another decided to stick to doing what he loves to do regardless of how much he'll get. He valued his happiness and desires to satisfying his greedy, gratifying nature. Make the right choice.

How to make your first million before 2012 ends!

"Listen! A farmer went out to plant some seed. As he scattered it across his field, some of the seed fell on a footpath, and the birds came and ate it. Other seed fell on shallow soil with underlying rock. The seed sprouted quickly because the soil was shallow. But the plant soon wilted under the hot sun, and since it didn't have deep roots, it died." (Mark 4:3-6).
Our generation these days is obssesed with a lot of things but one thing rings the loudest in my ears which is the desire to acheive success as quickly as possible. We want to make our first million in weeks, build a house in months and make it to the cover of Time magazine in a few years. The crazy and wasteful lifestyles of political office holders and celebrities mesmerise some and they also want that cloth, that house, that car, that attention. We go to church and hear prophecies and promises of faith and seed sowing, of instant change of lives (financially), deceiving christians to continue to give for their enrichment in the name of prosperity. The church continues with their building projects, not concerned about the welfare and growth of its members. What's the point?
Nigerians need to wake up and realise that there is no free food anywhere,no capacity for overnight success. True and lasting success comes from long periods of hardwork, diligence and commitment. Those seen at the top did not get there by wishing, giving and praying (alone), or losing their integrity. It takes years to make it to the point of fulfillment. Let no man deceive you with some story of how you can acheive that dream in a very short while. Nothing, in reality, works that way.
Please drop your comments and let me know how you feel about this.

This Too Shall Pass!

There are times when during my daily routine that I remember something from the past and give a broad smile. Or other times when I ask my brother "do you remember when…" It is at such moments as this that I practically realise that life is in phases. You finish one phase and move to the next. You then, look back at those times and smile. When an insurmountable problem stands before me, I look back to all the previous ones I have overcome and tell myself "this too shall pass". If I could surmount the last one, what could possibly stop me from doing the same to this?
Friends, this is a worthy way of restoring hope when everything seems like it's finally come to an end. Just keep believing that this too shall pass. Repeat it to yourself as many times as you can while you tirelessly work at dealing with the problem.
May God help us all. Amen.

The reality outside vs. the reality inside

There have been times for me when I would love to do something, I would be absolutely resolved to do it and ready to take action. Then on facing that situation in which I need to act in, it's like I had become paralysed. All the resolve and decisions I had made prior to such moment seem to have fizzled into the blues. When stuff like this happens I have discovered that the anticipated reality inside just does not match the reality you met outside. Such instances are seen daily, like when you plan to walk up to somebody (probably of the opposite sex) and when that person shows up, you suddenly cannot move a muscle or say a word; or when you intend doing a particular business at a particular time. All the business plans have been written and it seems everything looks fine until when you realise that it's not really so. Maybe wrong timing or a bad market busted your balloons but in all these there is a way out. Yes there is a way out when things like such happen. There are surely steps you can take to get back on track.
First is to re-strategize. Sit your ass down and plan again. Perhaps you missed something the first time. Include the new changes you have discovered and make another move. Don't do like many other people that just fold their hands and say "it isn't really my thing anyway". In life, one needs to learn to effectively respond to feedback. It is only an Omniscient God that can be certain about what the future holds, but for us as humans, we have no choice than to use the feedback we get from the environment to our profitable use. We all have Machiavellian tendencies in us anyways. According to Personal Development Guru, Anthony Robbins, and Kent Sayre the sure fire formula for success is this:
1) You set an outcome.
2) You monitor your results you get through feedback.
3) You vary your behaviour until you get your outcome.
When the reality within does not match that of the outside world, it could lead to a drop in one's morale or level of confidence in the capacity to succeed. When such occurs, the way out is to affirm yourself to become confident again. Do not stay at one spot, hoping for things to change. If wishes were horses beggars would ride. Recollect past experiences in which you have been able to rightly navigate yourself confidently in situations that everything looked bleak. Then your confidence will surge and you will be unstoppable!

The Future From Behind

She is a top executive at one of the best corporate firms in the country. Earning a six figure income, she has an apartment in the better parts of the city where she lives with her handsome and industrious husband. Their marriage has never been any better. The doctor says she is one month pregnant with her first set of children- twins. Her husband's business is thriving and the executives at his company are always vibrant with ideas to increase productivity and profits.
Wow! What a splendid success story! Some might be thinking "mstchew, who's he trying to deceive here? Who's living that kind of life?" Well, I don't know about you but I know that lifestyle is what many Nigerians enjoy even with the way things are going in the country. That story above is the dream of many young people, including myself. A dream where everything's working perfectly fine, where there's absolutely nothing to worry about. It is possible to get to that point and fulfil that craving. I will show you one way you can achieve this. Just read on.
Have you ever watched a movie from the end to the beginning? Like from its last scene to its first? How did it feel or look when you did such, awkward? When you do this you get a sense of what the movie's all about. You can envisage what would have happened to get to such an ending. Nothing will take you by surprise as you watch the movie because you have seen the beginning from the end. But do you know you can use this same approach in your life? "How?" you ask. It's simply by doing the same thing with your dreams and goals. It involves vividly playing a mental video of your desirable future and rewinding that video to the present. Now, between that point in time and now, what did you do to get there? What steps did you take to achieve that dream of yours? Could it be to be a first class student, to get a high paying job in an oil company, to have a loving family, or to set up an N.G.O? The Wise Master said, "Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. What is the first thing you will do? Won't you sit down and figure out how much it will cost and if you have enough money to pay for it? (Luke 14:28)". This has to do with planning and strategizing. You have to figure out the right steps to take to take you to where you want to go. For instance if you want to travel to a certain country, you must first be aware of where you are heading for and then how you will arrive there. Will you get there by flight, by seaways or by the road network? These are conditions you must ponder about before you take off on such a journey. Do you have a dream? Have you set SMART goals on how to get to the dream? What will it take you to achieve the dream? What did you have to sacrifice to realise your dream? Questions as such must not be left unanswered if one is to make it to his/her colourful and bright future.

Anything is possible, so also is the realisation of that dream. I believe in you. I believe in your dream. Do not give up. Keep at it and very soon you will breakthrough. Peace be with you.

The Chat Dude

He is at it again!
The chat addict is working his fingers on the small, cuboid device called a phone.
2go, BBM, Nimbuzz, Whatsapp, Facebook, Twitter...
He is on every one of those social networks,
Never will his mind be at one thing;
While working, he's chatting
While eating, he's chatting
While walking, he's stupidly chatting too.
Tell me one thing he ever does without having chatting at the back of his mind.
Always thinking of punch lines to use to get his friends lol
Or to get them reply "lwkmd" or "LMAO".
He has become a performer,
And his friends as his audience.
A miserable life he lives but thinks he's catching fun
All done just to avoid being bored.

The Fringe Benefits of Failure, and the Importance of Imagination by J.K. Rowling

The Fringe Benefits of Failure, and the Importance of Imagination
J.K. Rowling , author of the best-selling Harry Potter book series, delivers her Commencement Address, "The Fringe Benefits of Failure, and the Importance of Imagination," at the Annual Meeting of the Harvard Alumni Association.
Text as delivered follows.
Copyright of JK Rowling, June 2008
President Faust, members of the Harvard Corporation and the Board of Overseers, members of the faculty, proud parents, and,above all, graduates.
The first thing I would like to say is 'thank you.' Not only has Harvard given me an extraordinary honour, but the weeks of fear and nausea I have endured at the thought of giving this commencement address have made me lose weight. A win-win situation! Now all I have to do is take deep breaths, squint at the red banners and convince myself that I am at the world's largest Gryffindor reunion.
Delivering a commencement address is a great responsibility; or so I thought until I cast my mind back to my own graduation. The commencement speaker that day was the distinguished British philosopher Baroness Mary Warnock. Reflecting on her speech has helped me enormously in writing this one, because it turns out that I can't remember a single word she said. This liberating discovery enables me to proceed without any fear that I might inadvertently influence you to abandon promising careers in business, the law or politics for the giddy delights of becoming a gay wizard.
You see? If all you remember in years to come is the 'gay wizard' joke, I've come out ahead of Baroness Mary Warnock. Achievable goals: the first step to self improvement.
Actually, I have wracked my mind and heart for what I ought to say to you today. I have asked myself what I wish I had known at my own graduation, and what important lessons I have learned in the 21 years that have expired between that day and this.

The Paradox about Problems

I am not an adept lover of romance movies, though i do love watching other kinds of movies. Very recently i watched two particular romance movies that teach the same lesson. These two movies are 'not easily broken' and 'the vow'. From these movies i learnt that it takes the problems and upside downs of life to make things become right. There are some problems that won’t just go out of our lives unless we learn the lessons from them. Problems have a way of smoothening things up and making them better. They refine our characters and help us form better perspectives about life. We tend to treat people better, love our family more and become better givers. The usual concept we predominantly have about problems is negative, grave and causes nausea. But when we look at our lives over time, we’ll come to notice the impact these problems have had on the course of our lives. Poverty for instance helps people to become better managers of money, sickness helps to bring us to our senses regarding our lifestyle (most especially for people that never give themselves rest and are always in constant stress, sickness is the signal that they need rest), divorces and breakups are pointers to the fact that one needs to be more caring and should put in more work into the next relationship and as a final example, death teaches us to value our lives and of those we dearly care about. It’s all just Nature’s way of balancing life….Ying Yang, as the Chinese philosophy puts it.

Let Time do its work!

Here we are, in the 21^st century. Everything moves at high speed. If it isn’t, it’s considered obsolete. The internet, cars, jets, airplanes, even marriages must be all done quickly. The coffee is prepared fast, the noodles make waiting for food to get done an easier task. People have come to more easily fulfill their desires of instant gratification more easily and quickly than ever. Time isn’t seen in a matter of decades, years, days, weeks but in minutes and seconds now. Information zaps all in front of us that we find it difficult to quantify and reproduce what we are learning as before.

As the time race continues, most people take the same sick perspective toward success in their lives. They expect everything to work out quickly and easily without them breaking a single bead of sweat. They want to get it now! Now is the thing, not later. But things don’t work out like that. Everything has its own time and season. In the movies, there could be overnight success, but in reality, there is no such thing. One has to toil and wait for the ripe time to come.

Every single thing in this world has its own time of success, including the human race. If a friend or colleague is at the peak of his game (career, marriage, academics, relationship, family) and you are not, even though  you started out together, don’t fret or get jealous (though its entirely human to do such), just get relaxed and convince yourself that things will soon work out fine for you too. In every person there is this voice that speaks to us. Funny enough the voice in question only amplifies when things go wrong, like when your girlfriend rejects your long awaiting marriage proposal, or when the promotion bypasses you even though you know you deserve it. What you should do at such gloomy times is to pick yourself back up, shrug those confident shoulders and change what that voice is saying! Affirm yourself in positive ways by using positive words to make yourself feel really good.

Success is a turn by turn event. Don’t get freaked out if the tide isn’t flowing in your favour, very soon the wind will blow and all will be well. Just keep working hard and doing what you know how to do best and believe in. Keep putting commitment, dedication and endurance and perseverance as top priority values for your life and am telling you, as long as the sun will come up the next day, things will get better!

What are you looking at?

There are times when everything looks bleak, dull, uninteresting, tiring, frustrating and you just want to get out and end it all. There are times when it all looks as if all hope is lost, all desire to continue snuffed out by the disappointments of life. When times such as these come, what do you do? Do you continue to wallow in mud of self pity and drench yourself in the waters of gloom?

Yes, most times that’s the natural, default way of reacting to situations like these. To remain in this psychological and emotional state and expect others to understand us. Well, sorry to say but how can they if they aren’t feeling the same things? Misery loves company and if misery doesn’t get its company, things get really bad. It gets worse if we find no one to have around us to comfort us in times like these. So one good thing is to have a circle of people around that are there to help us back to our feet at such times.

Besides that, our perspective of life falls and rest on how we perceive situations around us. What is focused on in one moment has a large part to play in what happens in the next moment. Focus determines body physiology, the way we relate to people, the way people see us and how we react to situations in the environment. Change on the outside does not come except there is a change from within. When one focuses on everything that is wrong and could go wrong, darkness falls but when one switches to seeing everything that’s right, like the priceless opportunity of being alive, hale and hearty, having a good and supportive family, loving and caring friends, a steady marriage, career or academic pursuit, the whole picture comes alive. The light comes on and there is a visible change of attitude.

When next you are not feeling too good inside and you would like that to change, all you have to do is to switch your perception to everything that’s good and worth being happy about in your life and not too soon from then, you’ll be thankful than ever.

Looking good!

                Everyone wants that occasional compliment from people around. “Hey, you’re looking great, I like your shirt”, “hi there, you are the best dressed I have seen today. Nice shoes”.  There is inner desire to be appreciated and recognised by other people around us. So we try our possible best in using the resources available in the most astonishing of ways. We invest our money to buy these things so as to fulfil that gratification. Well, that is good thinking and action .Keep it up and well done. Your outlook the world matters  a lot .We’ve been told that the way you dress is the way you will be addressed, so it is quite paramount that we look good on the outside.

                But what about the inside? A lot of people walking the streets may look good on the outside and smell all nice and sexy but if you could check their inside, you would be singing “why oh why”. Their lives on the inside is a total contrast to their lives on the outside. They might dress to fool and impress people, but they’re true colours are eventually revealed. They might seem, lovely, gentle and perfect in public places like the Church , place of work, parties but in their personal lives  at home it is a different story.

                This article may be talking to you or someone you know. I did not write this to condemn anyone but to enjoy you to put things in other. There is no need for unnecessary impression management. Come out in your true colours. It is people of this kind that the Lord Jesus called fools and hypocrites (Matt 23). Let your life be clean, nice and healthy both on the inside and outside. Be good to people everywhere. No backstabbing, backbiting, gossiping or slandering. Behaviours such as these have being known to be detrimental to one’s health. Be free and open. Take life and embrace it in its entirety and you’ll come to be showered by so much love.